Terms of Endearment

There is something about Latin American that beckons my soul. I have fallen in love with Hispanic and Brazilian culture and have a feeling I will always be planted in two hemispheres. I went to the embassy and obtained my Ecuadorian Censo today, which is kind of like my green card. Even though I have this little I.D. that declares me a temporary citizen of the Republic of Ecuador, I know that I will be more than a provisional anything of Ecuador; this place will always have a claim on my heart that simulates the sentiments of home.

I have discovered many aspects of Ecuadorian culture which are quite precious. At the risk of being overarching stereotypical of the entire Ecuadorian civilization, I have derived several anthropological observations which have led me to conclude that Ecuadorians are legitimately endearing and engaging. Ecuadorians live very passionately and are an immensely caring people who aren’t afraid to show affection or be vulnerable even in the presence of strangers.
The first gesture you will encounter which might take you aback is that we like to kiss. Yeah, that’s right, Ecuadorians are very touchy feely. When greeting someone, even someone you are meeting for the first time, instead of saying hello and extending a hand in a very proper and distant manner; it is customary to hug and kiss on the check before bubbling with affection and asking how someone is. It is also customary to follow up any sentence by addressing your counterpart with expressions like, mi amor (my love), mi vida (my life), and mija (my daughter). My Papayó (Grandpa) jokes, saying, “We only wish we were French, so we could kiss on the cheek two times.” Before leaving a room or a function, you must literally hug, kiss, and bless everyone in your presence, no matter how numerous the company may be. When my Papayó leaves, he kisses you three times in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit and says something along the lines of “Te vaya con Dios” or “Cuidate y que Dios te bendiga” which translates to Go with God or Take care and may God bless you. Needless to say, I find Ecuadorians to be a very blessed and blessing people.

The next thing you will notice is that the diminutive is alive and well here. Ecuadorians add ito (a little bit of…) to everything giving bland words more emotion, showing a heightened level of endearment, and making for a extra precious conversation in general. Ejemplo: I am a gringa, which in Ecuador is the non negative term used to mark someone who is foreign (even Colombians are considered gringos). So I am my family’s very own gringita. I brought my family Hershey’s chocolates as a hospitality gift and when my Papayó found out that they were from los Estados Unidos, he said, “you mean to tell me estes chocolates son gringitos tambien.” (jajaja) Mi mamí, who is less than three weeks away from giving birth, is called gordita. Gorda in Spanish is the adjective used to describe being fat, but just add ito to it and it becomes a loving nickname for her situation. So you might as well become accustomed to cafecitos, galletitas, perros chiciquitos, y panteloncitos upon arriving in Ecuador.

Another thing, Ecuadorians tend to intertwine indirect and direct objects on purpose. Usually, I say le when grammatically speaking I should have said lo. My mistake is out of sheer ignorance, but Ecuadorians decisively choose to personify words instead of objectify them which I happen to find linguistically charming.

Oh, Ecuadorians have no concept of time or no spacial awareness what-so-ever. If you aren’t touching, you are too far apart making for some really snuggly moments. Also, there is such a thing as the Ecuadorian hour. Figuratively speaking, Latin America in general is in a different time zone. But apparently, time in Ecuador is even more relaxed and happy-go-lucky. Ecuadorians know a thing or two about grace. For instance, Ecuadorians allow a two hour grace period or window of time for any rendezvous. If you have a meeting at 10:00 a.m. and your Ecuadorian counterpart doesn’t show up until 12:05p.m, he/she will only apologize for being 5 minutes late because in the Ecuadorian time/space vortex, that’s the reality. Punctuality is dead here; only gringos bother wearing watches.

So just be forewarned that I might not be able to resist hugging and kissing you when I get back to Virginia, even if I’m only leaving the room for un ratito and returning shortly, be prepared for me being really squishy.